Slowly Waking

From this dream

I am slowly

Waking

Vision blurred

As my mind keeps

Clinging

To comfort,

Security,

Control.

Things I have

When sleeping and

Dreaming

Being in

A world of my

Making

A world where

I am never

Questioned

A world where

Everyone is

Like an

Echo that

Thunders through a

Tunnel

Confirming

My ego and

Beliefs.

Yet this dream

Is now fading

Slowly

My minds grasp

Is slipping as

I am

Realising

The world outside

This dream.

 

~ Greywatcher

Its been how long?

I feel like I’ve been sleep walking

Feet stumbling through another world

Repeative motions mixed with passive emotions

Day in and day out.

 

Its been how long?

Since I jumped off the wheel

Since I indulged myself

Since I had the time to be myself

With those who I love as themselves.

 

Its been how long?

Since I wrote, since I followed

A dream, a desire

Embraced something

That was true.

 

~ Greywatcher

 

 

 

Don’t Wait (Daily Prompt: Invitation)

Feet stall, heart thuds against your chest

Palms sweat as the fear sinks in, deep

Thoughts blur as though smothered in fog

What is it that scares you?

That seizes you on your path.

It’s as though you are waiting

For an invitation to follow, your dreams

For recognition, that the path you are taking is acceptable

Not to you, but by them

Those who surround you

Watching, witnessing

Each failure and success

Those who either cheer for you, or hold you back.

You hesitate, fearing what you would lose

If you made the decision

To chase your dream, your vision, your fantasy

Whatever you wish to call it

That path towards it will be difficult

A struggle, which would test you

A struggle, which will change you

Challenge you, shape you as you reflect

With each step towards becoming

That person you need to be

To achieve your highest dream.

 

~ Greywatcher

via Daily Prompt: Invitation

Don’t Blame Me

Arms around me, a solid embrace

Whispered words, like velvet

As you tell me

Don’t scream.

A cold burning sensation

Fires through my nerves

As an old wound re-opens

Tears fall from my eyes

As I realise the dagger you clutch

Has been in your hand

The whole time, carefully hidden

With seductive manipulation

Beautiful words that hid poisonous lies

You loved me, would protect me

From the world you claimed was against me

My brain clicks, I see it

You isolated me, made me dance

Like a puppet on a string

The song was yours, never mine

A sob escapes, it’s myself I blame

For being so weak

Foolish to believe

That something so good, could happen to me.

Droplets of blood

Fall from the blade

As you remove it, once again

A flicker, a spark of my life before me

I see it now, the truth I needed

To escape, be free from these chains

I scream, for life, for me

I see it now

You are a monster

Who preys upon the weak.

 

~ Greywatcher

Last Moment Together

Just let me watch

A little longer

So I can find my place

Amongst the stars

Knowing that these moments are my last.

 

Let me show you

Where you can find me

When your eyes gaze upwards

To the star-filled heavens

Heart aching to hear my laugh.

 

Hold me closely

So I can find comfort

In the strength of your beating heart

Knowing that my life

Will be remembered by those I loved.

 

Smile with me

Laugh as though nothing is wrong

Let us stay in the moment

And forget about those final grains of sand

Trickling through the hourglass of my life.

 

~ Greywatcher

Just Breathe (Daily Prompt: Relax)

Relax

Just breathe

I know the sudden

Realisation

Can be

Unsettling.

 

Release

Your mind

Think beyond the box

That contains you

Relax now

And just breathe.

 

Details

Of truth

Are unsettling and

Conflicting with

Your thoughts

And beliefs.

 

Witness

And see

With mind open and

Understanding

That lies

Surround us.

 

Relax

Just breathe

Either choose to speak

Or return to

Your sleep

And forget.

 

~ Greywatcher

via Daily Prompt: Relax

Journey of Life (Daily Prompt: Moody)

Life is just a journey

A rollercoaster ride for the insane

With twists and turns

And loops of many sizes.

 

Many choose to take the ride

Blindfolded with earplugs

Rammed tightly into their ears

To avoid the different music and sounds

That the rollercoaster provides

For they only want to hear

The music they have chosen

That they believe is

The music to life.

 

There are those who choose

To ride again, hoping for an improvement

From the last time they rode.

They find a better seat

That is comfortable, with a better view.

Around they ride

Through the twists and turns

With the comfort of knowing

Their pocket holds a blindfold

Should the ride become to

 

Then there are those who sit

Up the back, in a moody silence

As they watch the people come and go

From the journey that takes place.

They have long given up on their task

To teach, to guide, to inform

For the ignorant

Will not listen

To reason or wisdom

Gained from an eternity of rides

For they know these people

Only seek comfort

In the ride.

 

~ Greywatcher

 

via Daily Prompt: Moody

Sorry

It has
Been a while
You might have forgotten
That time, I cannot forget
So if there is a chance
You are out there
Somehow, reading this
I want you to know
That I am
Sorry.

Sorry
For my aggression
For my avoidance
For my disrespect
For my indifference
For being unable
To understand
You.

Sorry
For being busy
For being distracted
For being rushed
For being consumed
For being unable
To spend time with
You.

Sorry
For that time
For that comment
For that feeling
For that abandonment
For being unable
To notice the damage to
You.

One last time
I will say, sorry.
I have now forgiven myself
Changed myself, bettered myself
Let my actions show, my sincerity.
I acknowledge, that while we may never meet
I hope, you are out there
Somehow, reading this
Knowing this
Finding forgiveness, to be free.

~ Greywatcher

 

An Unbelievable Strength (Daily Prompt: Panoply)

Look here

At my panoply of beads

Each one

A sign of strength

Each one

Another step

Towards being free.

 

The pain

I endure is not just from

Needles and side-effects.

 

My strength

Goes beyond, the hospital door

The treatment and tests.

 

The strength to hold my mother’s hand

And whisper ‘It will be fine’

The pain to see my father’s tears

Falling silently from sleepless eyes

The strength to make plans

For the future that might not come

The pain to feel hope

Only to be told, ‘another round’.

 

My greatest strength

Is to keep fighting

Keep hoping and saying

‘I will be fine’

Even when it looks dark.

 

~ Greywatcher

 

via Daily Prompt: Panoply