Muse

I thought you long gone
Over time, you had been forgotten
Your voice became a faint echo
Until silence embraced me.
You had given me words for my emotions
Letting me form and shape them
Into images so others could understand
My pain, my joy and the emotions beyond describing.

But in your absence
I grew frustrated, almost feral
As the words are now so limited
They cannot express what I feel.
I struggle with the pen
Over time I tear up the paper
Weeping for the muse I had lost.

Even though you never left me
Your voice continued speaking
Though I had forgotten how to listen
Outside influences had deafened me
To fit in I had to shun you
To be accepted I had to be reinvented
Blinding myself to the knowledge I once knew
Becoming someone I was never destined to be.

My struggle became internal
My heart wrestled with doubt
My own mind sabotaged me and dragged me down
I was tormented by my emotions
By characters and stories I so wished to desperately tell
Yet as I put pen to paper to write
I wept again at the silence and the words that didn’t flow.
I gave up on the desire to tell
And yet my muse continued talking
Telling stories long dead and forgotten.

Time ticked on
My eyes opening to the influences
That made me a stranger.
One by one I removed them
No longer will I submit myself to their poison.
So my muse, whisper on
My ears are open, I am once again me.
Your words are wind and my doubts are fleeting
I am free to hear your words again.

~ Greywatcher

 

* Please feel free to follow my blog and read my other work.

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